Act Like a Man, act like a woman
The essay compares the sources without obviously stating it. It shares similar details in each source. The difference is what each source is studying or focusing on. The essay effectively summarizes what each source is saying in a few sentences by using the author’s own words. The author always relates the sources to her research question.
Development- above average
The essay has five scholarly sources and makes connections between all the studies.
The essay includes a strong introduction that explains the issue of sex/gender and its connection to society. The author clearly states the conclusion, where they wrapped up their last thoughts and stance on if gender is socially constructed. The author divided her essay into specific parts which were great because it helped the reader identify certain things.
Research Question-above average
The research question was rich and specific. It’s a fresh idea as gender studies are pretty new.
The author had clear sentences with great vocabulary. I think some sentences were confusing because the vocabulary they used was about gender and the typical reader wouldn’t know what they mean. The author didn’t explain these words. Overall, the essay has a great style it was clean and seemed like it was written by a professional in the field.
I only caught one mistake in the essay. It was well written.
I chose the essay about flat earthers. The author took quite a long time to get to the actual cultural norms and language. But it was interesting to see how the author added how many haters the community has. When they did get to the cultural norms/language they gave good examples.
For development, I felt like that part he rushed through it because when they were describing the flat earther community they were almost done with their essay.
The author’s essay had a great organization and took us through his experience from beginning to end.
The style of his essay was also well, the sentences were clear and understandable. But I do feel like he repeated some things a few times.
Grammar and spelling weren’t a problem in this essay. For creativity within the essay was not much but the whole idea of flat earthers is a creative topic.
I would give this essay a A-.
Elise Wu is trying to portray the factitious subculture. A culture of people who fake their illnesses to receive care and attention. Wu, who faked her illnesses is trying to recover from the behavior. Her first findings of this community is through a doctor, one she doesn’t trust is helping people in their best interest. She finds her first group of people that are victims of factitious disorder, someone they know, or love is manipulating them. This group is being advised by the same doctor that she distrusts. Just based on this doctor and group she is demotivated to recover. Two years later she returns to her route of recovery finding a group that is suffering from the factitious disorder. She calls these people “FDers”, although she is part of this group it feels like she’s looking on the outside in. To become part of this group she must provide her real identity which she fakes. Wu finds it ironic that most people are probably doing the same.
In the group, she identifies a lot of the tactics she also used to use as an “FDer”. She uses flashbacks to give us an idea of what she went through. One flashback is of her being observed by a group of medical students and a doctor. She realizes now that the doctor was hinting at her fake illness to the students, stomach pains that would come and go. As she realized this in the hospital she quickly tried to be discharge and change locations. Something “FDers” often do when they are found out.
Wu uses this language of “coming out” to describe telling people the truth about fake illnesses. This “coming out” is serious to “FDers”, they need to know who to trust, who would believe them and who will not be angry. Wu notes that after years of being in the group she’s become numb to these stories, that her empathy might’ve run out.
A lot of Wu’s footnotes are explanations for things that are not obvious to the reader. Some of her notes are also to increase the knowledge of her reader about certain words or phrases she uses in the text.
It was interesting to see how someone who suffers from the same disorder portrays those who are going through the same thing. A small part of me expected a story to be a bit different. I thought the community would be Wu’s safe space and a place where she doesn’t feel horrible about the things she’s done. But I was surprised when she got “bored” of the community and sought help from her old therapist. In a way, this group is great for those who have the disorder to realize they are not alone. But it could also make someone feel too safe that they don’t seek the help they need.
I’m at the administration building in City College. Sitting on one of the black couches facing the entrance of the building. There’s a front desk for the financial aid office. I noticed how a lot of students stopped at that office to ask questions than continued with their quests. I noticed two types of students mostly, ones that seemed relaxed and ones that seemed angry and in a hurry.
The relaxed ones strolled at a medium pace staring down at their phone. They don’t seem to be in a rush. They’re not looking at the lines like someone who is in a rush. They just stand in line or get a ticket if they need to and wait patiently on their phones or laptops.
The ones in a rush come through the entrance at a fast pace. Their body seems to know where it’s going on its own. They have this determined face that is locked on a certain office, usually the finical aid office. I noticed many upset or stressed students head straight for the financial aid office. These students are usually not on their phones, their eyes instead are looking at how long the lines are.
They are some students who seem to come here just to chill. They sit on one of the black couch’s or metal chairs and charge their phones. Always somewhere in the distance, you hear a student getting frustrated and confused with the responses they are getting. At some point, it just becomes background noise even when their voices get louder and angrier. You can also hear the employee who’s trying to help try to stay as polite as they can. It’s a cycle that never seems to end.
Some students walk out of the building with a small smile saying “Have a good day” to whoever helped them, and some students walk out with a grim. You can tell with the student’s body language if their needs were met.
There’s not much interaction between students in this place. They are there for business only, unless they came with friend/s. This building although it has more than one floor it barely seems like the other floors are being used. In the hour and a half, I was sitting there only about 4 students used another floor beside the first one.
The lines stayed mostly empty and I noticed it’s probably due to the virus. Students had on medical masks, gloves, and scarves around their faces although outside was not cold. I even saw some friends bump elbows instead of a hug or shake hands. They always laughed about the situation afterward.
When it comes to the interactions between students and employees behind the desk, it’s unique. When their ticket/name is called the student rushes quickly back up to the front. They try to be polite and ask the employee “how are you?” before the employee finishes the word “good” they are already asking the question. The employee doesn’t seem offended by this rude behavior. It almost seems like it’s an automatic response to say “good” and move on. The student always and I mean always at some point tell the employee they are wrong or misunderstood them. But the employee does understand them and is telling them the truth, just the truth they don’t want to hear.
Once the student has accepted the defeat, they usually stomp their hand down on the desk lightly and say “alright” more to themselves. I heard this happen many times in front of the admission office. Some students huff and others accept their defeats silently and leave with a quiet “thanks”.
You can tell this building is the most disliked building on campus. Students are here only to solve problems. And sometimes they aren’t solved, or they need time to be.